Bologna Post Part 2

So late, so sorry. It’s been a hectic summer with road trips, family visits, and just generally busy. Life gets that way sometimes. Here it is anyway. Part 2 as promised. Blog Post #124.

Verona

One major highlight of our trip to Italy in May was the Arena de Verona. It was spectacular. We didn’t stay for the concert but we heard that The Gladiators were coming up next.

The Search Gone Wrong

Before we arrived in Bologna, my wife and I used the interweb to search and research for our trip. Googling “Bologna Subway” did not yield the results we hoped for.

We arrived in Bologna by train and planned to take the bus to our hotel. There’s no subway other than the one that makes sandwiches. At the front of the train station were a series of bus stops with various numbers and letters. There were letters representing each bus stop and there were letters representing various numbered busses. We went to the stop we thought was ours, waited while we cooked in the sun, but our bus never came. We realized we had the wrong stop and the wrong bus. We moved to another stop and waited before realizing later that although we had the right bus number, the stop we wanted going the direction we wanted to go was on the other side of the street. We crossed the street and waited there for our bus.

The bus finally came and upon boarding, there was a card reader that required a bus card. We didn’t have a bus card and it did not clearly say you could use a credit card. We decided to just ride… like rebels from another land.

As we came to the very first stop, the bus shut down. Wow, is that what happens when non-paying rebels from a distant land violate the sanctity of the bus fare in Italy? It turns out that the bus had just broken down. Rather than wait for the next bus, we walked the 16 minutes to the hotel and vowed never to take a bus in Bologna again.

Take Me to Church

We walked looking for a road that went right. Although we didn’t know iti, we guessed it was Via de Poeti.

We ended up at a hotel that was part of a church. We saw popes doing ceremonies and drinking wine. We too drank wine. It was probably the only thing we had in common. I couldn’t drink the water there. It burned me.

Words of Wisdom

1. Be careful eating street food in foreign countries. You never know the standards.

We arrived in Verona in the afternoon. We noted that our hotel bathroom had a bidet just as the hotel in Venice had had. It gave us a warm feeling.

Once we were out and about, we found a street festival. My wife was hungry and she decided to get a sandwich from a outdoor vendor. The meat was out and being sliced by an older gruff man while his wife took orders, payments, and put together sandwiches. While I don’t speak Italian, I do understand Bitternese. These two continually bickered and snapped at each other while putting together my wife’s sandwich. It was a sandwich made with hate.

That night, I slept well hearing nothing untoward. I didn’t know that my wife spent the night on the toilet. She had food poisoning with the sandwich trying to get out of her in every way possible. That extra toilet saved the biday.

2. Know where you are.

My wife and I really enjoyed Geneva, Switzerland. We met up with good friends, tried great wine, and took in incredible nature. It was strange moving around figuring out where we were. One moment, we’re in France, then Switzerland, then France. Are we in France now? No… but now we are… and now we’re not. We’ll be back in France in a minute.

The Long Way Home

We arrived back in Paris looking forward to our direct flight to Vancouver. We boarded, got comfortable, and waited. An announcement from the pilot came a couple minutes before the scheduled take off, “We have a technical difficulty and will be taxiing to the maintenance area to have it looked at.” We taxied and then waited before another announcement, “Sorry folks. We will be disembarking and getting on a new plane.” We left the plane and were bussed to the terminal. Initially, not enough buses were sent so we stood on the tarmac for a while. It was fun.

After arriving back at the terminal, we waited while being given no information. It was also fun. Finally, we were told to go to a gate. When we arrived at the gate, we were given the bad news along with new instructions. The flight was cancelled and we would need to go to Departures. Going to Departures involved going through customs, passport checks, and security to return to “France”. So we went, lined up, went through the line, lined up again, went through, to finally make it to the other side.

Once we arrived at Departures, we found the area where every staff member of Air France was waiting for us. They brought people out of retirement to sit at the various desks to address this calamity. We stood in that line up for over four hours as people made their way to the desks to figure out how they were going to get to Vancouver.

When our turn finally came, the clerk very boldly stated, “We’ve got a flight for you tomorrow to Atlanta, Georgia, U.S.A. You’ll wait there for five hours before taking another flight to Vancouver.”

”No.” I said, “We’re not doing that.”

After some negotiations, research, and phone calls, we accepted a flight to Montreal the next day and a flight to Vancouver the following day. Air France put us in a hotel in Paris for the night and we departed the next day.

Once home, we applied for reimbursement and received most of the money back for the entire trip (the full round trip). That’s how you fly to Paris and back for almost free. We’re hoping to do that again next time we fly to Europe.

Well, that’s it for this late blog. I’m hopeful that the next post is coming soon. Thank you to everyone who supports this blog and sends messages of support. It’s now time for the ending jokes. I was asked how the AC/DC concert was in April. It was fantastic so I thought I’d share a bit more about that here. Enjoy.

It was crazy to see 50 000 people rocking to the music of 70 year old Angus Young and 77 year old Brian Johnson. Angus Young never stopped moving. That’s the thing with Angus. He’ll always be Young.

Funny looks and laughs: Half way through the concert, I leaned over to my friend and loudly stated, “If they don’t play Bad Medicine or November Rain, I’m going to be very upset!”

Readers Choose Amazing, Headlining the Anniversary.

Happy September. It’s Blog Post #116. You would think that a blog that was mostly photos would be popular and without controversy. That appears not to be the case. I received a number of messages expressing a less than satisfactory reception for Blog Post #115. They’re just jokes and play on words. As far as the Sweden stuff goes, I can’t change the past. What happened, happened.

Life

My wife and I have returned to our life in beautiful Vancouver. We’re working again and planning our next excursions. We’re preparing for a big party next month (stay tuned) and thinking of a short trip to Mexico next year. I can then do that Ted Talk in Spanish that I’m constantly being harassed to do. Vamos a ver.

The Trip Continues…

It sure does. The earth keeps swinging past the sun and then back again as it always has and will continue to do so. Don’t be fooled by the rhetoric that it revolves arounds the sun or that the Earth rotates. I mean, come on. How gullible are the gullible? Very gullible.

For Fauske Sake

During our recent trip to Europe, my wife and I spent time with family in Fauske, Norway. It’s a small municipality of less than 10 000 people. While we were there, The Arctic Race of Norway (an international multiple stage bicycle race) passed by and I took this photo.  It was the second biggest thing to happen in Fauske in 2024.

Happy Anniversary!

It’s hard to believe that it is now one year ago that the sensational novel, Jonah Chooses Amazing was released to critical acclaim. In honor of this one year anniversary, the price has been slashed 25%. You can get your copy of this incredible novel here. Jonah Chooses Amazing

Writing Update

With all the requests I get for updates on my writing, I thought I’d throw a quick one in here. I’m still working on the screenplay for Jonah Chooses Amazing but it’s a long term project. My next book, The Regrets We Can’t Have is moving at a snail’s pace, but I hope to start sharing some updates in early 2025. Currently, I’m still selling copies of my first book, Nursing. The Funny Side of the Bedside despite it now being five years old. As for Jonah Chooses Amazing, the sales have really slowed. It’s been buried in a sea of so many novels that its greatness has not been fully discovered. It’s the chance you take when you self publish as I have. Most importantly, this masterful blog continues and will continue for some time. Thank you to everyone who supports all my writing endeavors.

Words of Wisdom

1. Headline writing is important.

I recently read a headline that said, ‘The Best States to Retire In’. I went to read the article. It was not at all what I expected. They talked about California, Florida, Arizona, and New York. I thought to myself, “Those aren’t the best states to retire in. The best states to retire in are healthy, happy, wealthy, calm, relaxed, content, active etc.”

2. Headlines can be strange.

I read a headline that said, “Camera Man Can’t Keep Up with Cheetah’s Speed.” Well, considering that cheetahs have a documented top speed of 103 km/ hour and the fastest human has been recorded going 44.99 km/ hour, it doesn’t seem to be worth even making a headline about it. “Plumber Unable to Stay Underwater as Long as Basking Shark”. How was a camera man with all that equipment going to even be close to the world’s fastest animal? If you strapped the camera and all the equipment on the cheetah, I’d still take the cheetah. “Cheetah Bogged Down by Cameras and Equipment Can’t Keep Up with Man”. There’s a joke here about the man being some sort of cheater but that’s for another blog.

3. Headlines rock… and leave questions.

“Dave Grohl Announced that He had Fathered a Child Outside His Marriage Earlier Today.”

4. Don’t steal from Jay Leno.

Thanks for reading this month’s blog post. “Readers Can’t Keep Up with Out-There, Nonsensical, Off-Putting, Obscure-Referencing Blog Post”.

I appreciate all the messages I’ve been getting via email, FB Messenger, and through my website… even if not always positive.

I don’t have an ending joke this time around. Instead, my wife insisted that I answer a question that she said everyone will be asking. I told her that the answer is clear and obvious. She said, “No, it’s not.” I said, “Yes! It is.” She said, “No, it isn’t.” I said, “Is so.” She said, “Isn’t.” I said, “Is too.” I decided to answer her question. Enjoy.

Wait! What was the biggest thing to happen in Fauske in 2024?

I wrote that already. International award winning author, Roy G. Mundheim was there visiting.

Forge a New Path and Change Your @#$%in’ Password!

Happy Holidays!! It’s Blog Post #107. Thank you to everyone who has purchased Jonah Chooses Amazing so far. I’ve reached my goal of $200.00 to donate to the Heart and Stroke Foundation!! An update will be provided in Blog Post #108.

With the upcoming holidays, I thought I’d share an excerpt from Jonah Chooses Amazing, the year’s greatest gift possible.

“Happy George Michael Memorial Day Eve!”

“Oh yeah… I forgot you call it that. I hope ham is ok. Oh good, you found the tree and set it up. We can decorate it once I get the ham in the oven.”

Decorating the tree with holiday songs of yesteryear and hits from Wham was followed by setting the table and putting out the presents. Jonah had managed to get presents despite his recent troubles and a schedule that made Mother Nature look like a part time worker.

Q&A

Continuing with last month’s theme, I asked for emailed questions and promised to answer. I’m sorry if I didn’t get to yours or if the answer is delayed because I don’t want to give away any spoilers quite yet.

What is your writing process like? Do you write every day?

I do not write every day. I write when I have down time, when I’m feeling inspired, or when it’s been too long. No pressure. No deadlines. It’s what works best for me.

How is your health?

This wasn’t really the type of question I was looking for but since so many asked, I thought I should answer. It’s ok. I continue to have unexplained neurological symptoms. However, since September I have been feeling much better, much more like my self, with a very noticeable reduction in intensity and severity of symptoms. My doctor is very encouraged and optimistic of full recovery but that it will take time.

What’s your next book about?

It is called The Regrets We Can’t Have. It will be a series of short stories exploring regret, decisions, emotions, and human behaviors. It will look at how we see ourselves, how we want to be and act in certain situations, but how we so often fall short. I’m hopeful of a 2025 release. It could very well be the final book in human history not written by A.I.

Words of Wisdom

1. Celebrate. Celebrate the year that was with all its ups and downs. Celebrate the year to come. Despite the crazy state of the world, you and I are still here to enjoy it. That’s worth celebrating.

2. Don’t complain. When you order gelato that is the size of a golf ball and it costs three times your hourly wage, rest easy knowing that it hurts… just as it should. It should be a bit painful to indulge in things that aren’t good for us. In fact, instead of eating that gelato with the barbie doll sized spoon they give you, eat it all in one bite and get brain freeze. Let the pain flow through you.

End of the Line

This is my last post for 2023. We’ve come to the end of the year. It’s been a year of ups and downs for me personally. There’s been the challenges with my health which has also seen many positives as I seem to be making progress. There’s the sense of accomplishment and the positive feedback from completing and releasing my first novel, Jonah Chooses Amazing. Then, there’s all the things to be grateful for… and there are many. Friends, family, good times, and my wonderful wife Lesly. While we’ve come to the end of the line this year, I look forward to 2024, even is it means getting off this track and forging a new path.

Seattle U.S.A 2023

Thanks again for supporting this blog (by reading and sharing it) and supporting my novel, Jonah Chooses Amazing (by buying it, sharing about it, and most importantly reading it). I will answer some of your specific questions about the book in the next couple of blog posts. Happy Holidays and happy reading. Cheers. It’s now time for the ending jokes. Enjoy.

How many passwords do we need to have now? There’s a password for your computer, your phone, your bank, your government tax file. There’s passwords1 for every application, social media account, streaming service, and cloud. We need password1234 for Skyping, Zooming, Messaging, and Whatsapping. We even have a password678 for our app that manages all our passwords. Then they ask that these passwords be regularly changed and you can never use the same password44 twice. @#&% !! It’s crazy707.

In community health nursing, I have to have a user name and password for every program I access… which is a lot. They ask for a new password at least every three months while continuing to adjust the parameters of letters, numbers, and characters. The passwords8484 become so elaborate and safe that those who create them are also locked out. It’s crazy9918!!

There was a nurse at my work who retired early. In the exit interview, they asked why she was leaving. She said she loved her job but that she had run out of passwords for all the programs she had to use.

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I’m pleased to announce that Jonah Chooses Amazing is a finalist for RGM Publishing’s Book of the Year. Winner to be announced in January.